A Whiter Shade of Pale
by bebitched
Summary: Shannon finds herself in a difficult situation with her stepmother after rescue, and must face raising her children in a different world, with the help of some familiar castaways. This is a two part story that I started a while ago but recently finished.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: This story is Pt. 1 of a double part story. Spoilers definitely up to the end of season one, but selected info from season two. Shannon/Boone/Sayid but angled more towards S/S.

* * *

Her small feet tapped down the winding staircase in a joyous melody of excitement. She bustled past the maid who she hadn't bothered to learn the name of, hurrying toward the double doors and bursting through them. Her father was talking adamantly with someone on the phone, but that didn't matter.

"_Daddy, daddy, come play with me!" she demanded, pulling incessantly on his jacket sleeve and giving him the puppy dog eyes she usually used to get her way. But he would have none of it._

"_Not now, Shannon, I'm busy", off her look he added, "Maybe later"_

_That wasn't good enough for her, "But I want to play now", stressing the 'now' with a strong urgency. He waved her away, not bothering to use words this time. She pouted, but began to back away. When she reached the double doors, she turned around and gaped in shock. Her father was no longer sitting in the winged chair. _

"_Sayid?" she asked him, taking a step toward him and furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. He glanced up and put a finger over his lips._

"_I don't have time for you now, Shannon"_

"_But-" she began to protest, however a distant cry came from behind her._

"Mommy!"

_She peered questioningly again toward Sayid. He stared right back, a black expression on his face. Hesitantly, she took off in an effort to find the sound._

A tiny hand shook her shoulder, desperately trying to wake her. Shannon's eyes finally opened and her daughter sat back on her heels.

"What is it Grace?" she questioned wearily, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes before her hand fell exhaustedly to her side.

"Mommy, there's a boat!"

* * *

The airport was crowded. It had been awhile since Shannon had been in a tight space with the bodies of strangers packed against her. On the island you always had as much space as you needed to think, read, even scream where you knew no one would hear you. Even when a monster was chasing you, you could still breathe.

She was suffocating. She used to enjoy being in clubs, with gorgeous guys abound and nothing keeping you from taking exactly what you wanted, anonymity shrouding everyone and everything. Now she just shut her eyes as tight as possible and griped her daughter's hand in her own, because Grace was just a scared as she was. Her other palm went to stroke Nathan's head, his soft hair light against her fingers as she breathed in and out. His scent calmed her, that distinct baby smell somehow bringing her down to earth. Only six months old, he wouldn't even remember the island. Maybe that was for the best.

"Shannon!" someone called out to her, someone unfamiliar. She distinctly remembered the exact pitch and tone of everyone's voice on the island. Shannon opened her eyes and turned toward the sound. At first she saw no one she recognized, but as she looked deeper into the crowd, she noticed a woman who vaguely resembled her step-mom.

"Sabrina?" she questioned, her gaze grazing the woman's features. Her blonde hair had begun to dull with age and her skin was stretched unusually thin across her face. Face-lift, Shannon thought. She should have known the woman would resort to those measures, she had always spent hours looking in the mirror, smoothing out then retracting the thin wrinkles on her face. And that was ten years ago.

"Shannon" she returned, a bit disdainful for being directed towards a woman who had been presumed dead for the past four years. She glanced behind Shannon, "Is Boone with you?"

She gaped, "You mean they didn't tell you?" she was at a loss for what to say to the woman about her beloved son. Sabrina had always doted over him, never relenting in her claims that he was absolutely perfect in every way. But of course even that didn't stop her manipulations of both him and her.

"Tell me what?" concern flooded the woman's eyes as Shannon searched for the right words. She could find no way to put it gently, so she just said it.

"Boone's dead"

"He's what?" she questioned, taking a small step back.

"I thought they would have told you, he was killed in an accident more than three years ago."

Sabrina's eyes found the floor as her only comfort. Shannon knew how she felt. The grief of Boone's death had dulled with time for Shannon, but it was now fresh in her stepmother's mind and heart.

She licked her lips as she glanced back up. Shannon's pitying gaze made her feel so vulnerable, so she hardened her features and plastered on a smile.

"Well, I suppose that's that." There was a pause between the two women. "But what's new with you, Shannon?"

She was taken aback by her repression of grief, but answered automatically. "I've been on a deserted island, how much could have happened to me?"

Her smile intensified, as if strengthening levies to hold back a coming flood, "Well that's obviously not true. Last time I saw you didn't have so much baggage in tow"

It took Shannon a moment to realize she was talking about her children, "Oh, yeah. This is Grace," she placed a reassuring hand on the girl's back, "And this is Nathan" she gently jiggled the boy in her arms.

"And who do each of them belong to?" Sabrina asked lightly, wiggling her fingers at the children and bending down to Grace's level to shake her hand.

"Their both mine"

Sabrina stood up abruptly. "Their what?"

"I had them both on the island" Shannon stated confusedly, not sure why Sabrina would think this so unbelievable.

"But their…" Sabrina trailed off, looking from the boy's tan complexion and dark waves to Grace's sandy blonde hair and pale face.

"Their what?" Shannon raised her eyebrows.

The woman looked as though she was about to say something, but thought better of the comment, "Nothing. Their just beautiful, that's all"

"Oh. Well, thank you" Shannon offered uncertainly. She placed an arm around her daughter's shoulders and hugged her closer. "We should probably get going. The press mobbed us at the dock so there's no telling how long it will take them to find us here"

"That… that sounds like a good idea" Sabrina said, sounding distracted. When Shannon glanced at her, she was still staring at Grace. The girl shrunk away from the gaze, turning and hiding her face behind her mother's thigh.

"Sabrina? Are you alright?"

She tore her eyes away, "Yes, I'm fine. Let's go"

Sabrina began to ask the question she had been dying to know, "So Shannon, is Grace-" but she stopped mid-sentence when she glanced up at her stepdaughter.

Shannon stared, gaping at a middle-eastern couple in the crowd. They held up a large sign that said "Sayid Jarrah"

"What is it Shannon?" when Shannon didn't answer she followed up with, "Do you know those people?"

"Not- not exactly" she managed to choke out.

Shannon swallowed the lump in her throat before stepping over to them.

"Mr. and Mrs. Jarrah?" The woman nodded her head in understanding. "Are you Sayid's parents?"

They looked to each other in confusion before responding to Shannon in Arabic. Just then a tall man stepped out from behind the couple and offered his hand.

"Hello. I'm Majed, Sayid's brother. These are my parents", he gestured toward the couple, "Do you know Sayid?"

"We were… acquainted", Shannon shifted Nathan on her hip uncomfortably.

"Were?" Majed asked, referring to her use of past tense.

"You don't know either?" She questioned, her mouth dropping open at the task of telling another that their son was dead.

"What are we supposed to know?"

"Sayid is…" she trailed off. Unlike Boone's death, Sayid's still stung. Especially when she saw Nathan and knew that Sayid would never see him grow into a man.

"Is he dead?" Majed inquired standoffishly.

Shannon bit her lip until it turned white and nodded her head.

"Dead?" Sayid's mother yelled. Apparently she knew that much in English.

Majed turned to comfort his mother.

"Thank you for telling us" he nodded his head toward her and began to walk away.

She felt her stomach twist into a knot as she watched their retreating figures.

"Wait" she called after them.

Majed turned around "What is it?"

"On the island, Sayid and I… we had, I had… we had a baby" she brushed the wispy hair on Nathan's head as if it were the period at the end of her sentence.

He hesitated, then translated for his parents, saying the last word gravely. His father's features hardened then said something harshly. Majed looked Shannon in the eye then quickly glanced away.

He was intently studying the carpet when he relayed the comment. "My father says a child my son bore out of wedlock is no grandson to us"

When the trio hurried away and out of the airport entrance, Shannon was still in shock.

She didn't speak until Sabrina lightly placed a hand on her shoulder. "Shannon? We should probably get home"

After a moment of staring at the empty spot where Sayid's family once was and watching as the crowd expanded into the vacancy, she nodded her head and turned toward the side entrance. She wasn't in the mood for the paparazzi at the moment.

* * *

The soft glow of early morning crept through the house like a dense fog. Although it was not yet light, Shannon was already awake. She sipped her tea and flipped through the newspaper.

She would have suspected that after being on a deserted island for years she would have been pouring over back issues of _Entertainment Weekly_ or _Us_ magazine, but somehow watching the stars fade didn't seem as important as global wars and famine anymore. However, one eye did wander over to the _People_ magazine on the glass table in the adjoining room, but for other reasons. Apparently they had decided to do an entire month's spread dedicated to the survivors of flight 815's crash, which really meant they wanted to get some dirt on the group hogging the largest part of the lime-light for the time being. This week featured an article with information on Driveshaft's comeback tour and whether the DA would press charges against Kate, considering that she had, for all intensive proposes, served four years already. The front cover was splashed with photos of them. At first she sighed at the fact she had managed to stay out of the whole thing so far, but then she caught sight of a small box in the bottom border that read "Children of Eden, Page 15". The picture it captioned was of Grace in a swing at the playground. Quickly flipping to the page, she discovered that they had done an entire article on the kids born on the island and even an interview with a pediatric psychologist on how the isolated upbringing might effect them later in life. They had a picture for each of the five children, Grace and Nathan included.

That was the last straw. The press could smear her in the tabloids. They could call her a spoiled slut who only thought of herself, but so help her if they used her children for fodder she would have their heads on a platter. She scanned the page with narrow eyes until she found a contact number at the bottom. Snatching the portable phone off its hook she jabbed each button as if they them selves had offended her. She then calmly placed the phone to her ear, growing even more furious with every ring.

When the other end finally picked up and greeted her call with a cheery hello, her voice was cold and yet seething all at once.

"I would like to speak to your editor. Now" she ordered, spitting out the last word as if it were venom.

"May I ask who's calling?"

"This is Shannon Rutherford. I'm a survivor of the flight 815's plane crash".

She couldn't help but sound snobby. After all, she had something they wanted and if life had taught her anything it was that an advantage point was meant to be exploited.

"Oh, yes, I'll put you through right away", the receptionist quickly promised, and Shannon smiled calculatedly.

But that faded from her face as the line clicked once more.

"Why hello Miss. Rutherford. Thank you for contacting us."

"No problem at all." Her grin returned.

"I would first like to thank you for agreeing to do an interview, the others haven't been very… cooperative. Would you mind if I recorded this conversation?" he questioned, although his tone told her that he already was.

"I would like to say something first" she stated.

"By all means" he allowed condescendingly. She hadn't been asking his permission.

"My children and I have been through a lot this past week, reporters not being the least of it. All of us just want to get back a little hint of a normal life. Now, I can understand why you want to get the biggest story in you're an entire career on the front page, but if you ever come near my children, or me, ever again, I will personally guarantee that you will never publish anything more than stories on traffic tickets. Do you understand me?" She said slowly and calmly, as if she was talking to a toddler because she might as well have been.

The man cleared his throat, "Understood"

"Good"

She clicked off the phone and imagined it was that asshole's eyes being gouged out. Calmly setting the phone back on the hook, she turned back to the newspaper as if she had only requested a housemate to pick up milk at the store.

"Who was that?" A voice came from the kitchen doorway.

"The press from hell" Shannon informed matter-of-factly, not bothering to look up from her reading.

Sabrina sighed, "Oh. Them."

Shannon sipped her tea, "You sound disappointed"

"Not disappointed, just tired. Don't they have anything better to do?"

"Guess having every girl in the city turn their noses up at them doesn't fill their time" she offered, slowly flipping the page as she finished scanning the article about how stock in companies in which Hugo Reyes owns shares continued to rise. Whoever Hugo Reyes is, he's definitely a lucky bastard.

"What are your plans for the day?" Sabrina asked casually, yet there were undertones of purpose that Shannon had grown able to detect with years of experience.

"Nothing much, just hang around here", she paused, "Any reason you want to know?"

Sabrina chose her words carefully, "No, not really. I was just thinking you might want to go shopping for some clothes."

Shannon rolled her eyes and set down the paper, looking at her stepmother. "And why would I want to do that?"

"You are running dangerously low on things to wear. Shirts stripped from corpses…" she fingered the fabric on Shannon's sleeve, "and pants that were small when you were eighteen and still living in this house…" she then pointed toward the jeans she could now barely zip up and button, "are not going to last you, I'm sorry to say", she stopped, then picked up again, "And shopping has always made you happy. No offence, Shannon, but you look like you could use a little pick-me-up"

Shannon took this into consideration, but shook her head, "No. I'm just not ready to go out yet."

Groaning, Sabrina walked over to the blonde woman and put her hands on her shoulders, "Unless you go out and give it a shot you will never be ready. You just went through a very traumatic experience, but testing the waters is the only way you will be able to get back into society. You don't want to become one of those pitiful shut-ins you see on the news, do you?" she said, although it sounded dangerously close to a threat.

Sighing, Shannon reluctantly agreed. "Alright, I'll go. But I don't know what to do with Grace and Nathan. They shouldn't go with us, I don't want to press getting a hold on them, but I'm sure as hell not leaving them" she confirmed in a tone that meant she was not going through with either option, no matter how much convincing was offered.

Sabrina grinned, "I know just what to do"

* * *

The clothes on hangers swayed like a drunk supported by a designated driver as the woman pushing the rack swaggered through the front door.

"These clothes are only to be tried on. While wearing them, there is no eating, drinking or doing any other activity that may damage them. Understood?" the woman questioned as if Shannon were a felon doing community service for the first time.

Shannon merely looked at her as if she were crazy and did all but hide behind her stepmother as she looked to her for help. Only a week of being with no one but her children and Sabrina and she had completely forgotten how to interact with anyone else.

"We understand" Sabrina accepted for her, taking a hold of the other end of the sales rack as a hint for the woman to let go.

She seemed skeptical for a moment before releasing it and leaving it in the care of the two.

Shannon sighed in relief when the door shut with a click behind the sales woman.

"Thank God, I thought she'd never leave."

Sabrina chuckled. She began to flip through the clothes rack, hungrily sliding her hands over the luxurious fabrics and rich colors.

"Beautiful, aren't they?" she asked with a lust in her voice, like the growl of a lion eyeing the think muscle of a grazing gazelle.

Shannon hummed a dreamy 'yes' as her gaze swept over the designer brands.

"I still can't believe you got them to send a sales rack over. How did you talk them into it?"

Sabrina's nose seemed to shoot farther into the air and her shoulders angled back slightly as she replied. "Money speaks louder than words. You have no idea the power you hold over a business when a quarter of their yearly revenue comes from your pocket"

Shannon grinned as she took a deep purple shirt made in a material that must have come straight from the gods off the hanger.

"This is beautiful!" she exclaimed, slipping her arms into the button up shirt and spinning around towards the full-length mirror. She assessed herself looking forward, from behind, and sideways. A flattened palm spread over her stomach and the weight she hadn't yet lost from her second pregnancy. Letting her arm drop to her side, she shrugged it off and continued to look at the sales rack.

"You shouldn't feel bad. It took me seven months to loose the weight I gained while I was pregnant with Boone. And you didn't have a gym."

Shannon glanced up at the sound of Sabrina's voice but quickly returned her gaze toward the mauve tank top in her hand.

Sabrina must have taken this as a sign to keep talking because she did.

"There is something I've been wanting to know, Shannon" she approached the question cautiously, "About Grace".

"You want to know if she's Boone's" Shannon finished for her.

"Yes"

"She's Boone's alright," Shannon confirmed. She didn't look up but Sabrina could sense the slight contempt in her voice that had probably shown through to her eyes.

"Oh." Sabrina didn't quite know what to say in response. She had expected Shannon to play the evasive card or possibly even deny it completely. Straight forwardness must have been a trait she picked up on the island. "And Nathan? His father was the son of those people at the airport that you talked to?"

"Yeah", off Sabrina's questioning look she added softly, "He was killed a month after Nathan was born."

Switching topics, Sabrina found a way, yet again, to bring it back to Shannon and Boone.

"So does Grace know? About who her father is, I mean."

"No, and she's not going to. Sayid was her father from day one, always will be."

"Does that mean that I'm not really her grandmother?"

"I didn't say that."

Sabrina looked slightly hurt, with anger just boiling under the surface. "Didn't Boone mean anything to you? I mean he is the biological father of your child AND he's your step-brother!"

"I'm not saying he meant nothing, but I didn't love him that way."

"And how long did you wait after having my son's love child to shack up with the first guy you saw?"

It was Shannon's turn to be hurt, but mostly because what she had said was fair. And it was partially guilt over what she was forced to say next in an effort to by truthful.

"I was actually dating Sayid all through the pregnancy."

Sabrina gave her the strongest look of shock she could muster before sneering. "I'm glad Boone's death was so easy to get over. Wouldn't want you to miss a wink of beauty sleep."

"Hey! Boone was dead, I had to move on!"

Something sparkled in Sabrina's eyes, like a sharp dagger in the moonlight about to stab her in the back. It made Shannon very uneasy.

Almost as if her body knew it was coming before her conscience did, her head shook side to side slightly before the words left Sabrina's lips.

"Anyone ever suspect Sayid in the plane crash? I mean, Middle-eastern guy on an airplane that mysteriously crashes? Not exactly inconspicuous."

Shannon gave her a horrified look.

"What's the matter?" Sabrina asked innocently, though the smile touching at the corners of her mouth told her she knew exactly what she had said and how it would be taken.

Shannon spoke through gritted teeth. "Just because he was from Iraq, doesn't mean he was a terrorist."

"I thought all Arabs got their jollies out of blowing up buildings."

For some reason Shannon's eyes went directly over toward her children, Grace sitting stock-still and Nathan gurgling in his car seat. Grace seemed to huddle a little closer to Nathan's chair, her eyes growing narrow protectively. It wasn't as if they hadn't heard things like that before. Shannon hated that Grace was both old enough and smart enough to know why people pointed at them on their way out of the airport that first day back. She hated that Grace had suddenly begun to take into account that her little brother's skin was darker than her own. But most of all Shannon hated that she had just heard that Nathan was somehow different out of her own grandmother's mouth.

Her eyes turned back toward Sabrina, her eyes somehow growing darker.

"How dare you"

As she said it she began to shake, then pointed a trembling finger at her stepmother.

"How dare YOU" Sabrina repeated back. "You act like Boone was nothing to you. Some trash to be thrown away on garbage day."

"Maybe you have every right to be pissed at me. Hell, you can even hate me for forgetting you precious son. But when you bring race into it… that's when you cross the line."

"But race is apart of it, Shannon. The minute you decided to have a child with a middle-eastern man was when you chose to make your son stand out. Grace is different, whether you like it or not."

A look came over Shannon's face like she had somehow figured her out. "It isn't that he was middle-eastern, now is it. You just can't stand that I felt something for anyone after Boone died. And for the record, Sayid was a good man who wanted nothing more than to take care of his children. And yes I said 'children', because he was more of a father to Grace than Boone was."

"Past tense, huh? I would have suspected that since Sayid's only been dead for five months, you would still be correcting yourself."

"Are you insinuating that I didn't care about Sayid because I used past tense?" she arched a daring eyebrow.

"Of course not. I'm insinuating that you're a cold hearted bitch who cares about no one but herself."

Shannon's mouth dropped open just the slightest before she closed it, tightening her jaw and making a resolve.

"That's it. I'm leaving."

Shannon went straight for her children, slinging a diaper bag over her shoulder, snapping the arm on the car seat up into position and clutching it in one hand, while she picked up Grace with the other. She realized on the way out the door that she had been holding the purple shirt the whole time. Nail marks bit into sleeve where she had gripping it tightly in her rage. Dropping the garment on the floor, Shannon viciously stomped on it and wiggled her heel, leaving a clear shoe print on the back of the shirt. It was only until after she had slammed the door behind her that she noticed she had no transportation, no money and no where to go.

* * *

To Be Continued 


	2. Chapter 2

Here's the second and last part to this story, although you should look for a PB&J-centric story coming up as a continuation of this plot, with appearances of Jack, Kate, Shannon, Sun, and others!

* * *

"Miss? I'm sorry but this is the end of the line. Was there somewhere you were trying to get to?" 

The bus driver bent over Shannon and she glanced up at his pitying features.

"No, not really."

Shannon had been riding this bus for the last four hours, hoping to come up with a plan as to how she'd be able to support herself and her two children. She had no connections anymore, no savings, she wasn't even legally alive. Sabrina had filed for her death certificate a year after her disappearance. So far, no ideas as how to miraculously sprout wings and fly to Sydney, where most of the other plane crash survivors had ended up. And those were the only people who would even speak to her. Guess other people they thought her bad luck would rub off. There was only one couple who lived in Los Angeles, and she wasn't sure what their number was. It was either 263-3061 or 259-0539. One was Charlie and Claire's, the other was Hurley's and she really didn't want to get pulled into another drawn out conversation about cheese, which she wasn't even sure how got started. Point was, she hadn't picked up her address book in her stepmother's house and she wasn't about to back. All she had was what had been thrown into the diaper bag, which only included a half-empty lip-gloss and some fuzzy mints. So here she was, on a grimy bus stop in the middle of the city.

Taking her cell phone out of the diaper bag, Shannon took a chance and picked one of the two phone numbers, dialing slowly as if she were afraid the device would bite her. She gently placed the phone to her ear and waited impatiently as the other end ringed. She sighed heavily when a female voice picked up the other end.

"Oh, thank God it's you Claire!"

"Shannon?" Claire asked uncertainly.

"Of course it's me, you forgot my voice already?"

"No, not quite yet. What's going on? Why did you call?"

"Can't a friend just call and see how things are going?'

"Shannon…"

"Oh, all right, so I had an ulterior motive. I'm kind of stranded in a not so nice part of town." Shannon paused to glare at a pair of men ogling at her. She didn't blame them, she had always accepted that she was beautiful, but since she was off the island with her children, the looks took on another meaning.

"So, you're wondering if I can pick you up?"

"Well if you insist…" Shannon mocked defensively.

"Where are you exactly?"

"You're a life-saver, Claire!" she exclaimed, a smile spreading across her features.

* * *

"So are you going to tell me or am I going to have to ask?" 

Shannon glanced away from the window and looked toward the voice that had stirred her from her thoughts. Claire raised her eyebrows questioningly, though her lips were still parted in a smile.

Shannon turned her gaze toward the passing scenery again. "Tell you about what?"

"About the call out of the blue for a rescue mission. Is everything alright, Shannon?"

Shannon pulled in her lips then let them out with a small puff of air, making a light popping sound.

"Everything is fine."

"Then what's going on with you?" Claire's expression turned to that of worry. "Did something happen with you're step-mom? Because when you talked about her on the island she sounded-"

"Claire!" Shannon interrupted. Claire glanced away from the road to look her passenger over. Shannon took the opportunity to nod toward the back seat, where the children slurped happily on ice cream. Aaron slouched in the seat directly behind the driver's side, devouring a mint chip cone down to the quick with green slop dribbling down his chin. Grace had been carefully taking her time eating her bubble-gum ice cream lick-by-lick, but since Claire had mentioned her grandmother, she had begun to squirm uncomfortably in her seat.

"I'll tell you everything. Later." Her eyes said everything.

Claire bobbed her head up and down.

"Later," she agreed.

After a moment of silence, Shannon tried to make small talk.

"So how are you? How's Charlie doing? He may have annoyed me on the island, but now I kind of miss his stupid jokes, like after you swat a fly you miss the buzzing-" Claire gave her a look, "-sound?" she finished uncertainly. She giggled uncomfortably and cleared her throat. Shannon had always wondered why Claire had ended up with such a… dork. She had always thought Claire could do better, but then again she herself hadn't had much luck in relationships, so maybe falling in love for, well, love was better than for someone who could take care of her. A lot of good that philosophy had gotten her: two kids and no husband.

"He's good." Claire responded finally.

"I read in that magazine article that Driveshaft is doing well."

"Oh, yeah, did you see that? They did a whole month on _us_, like we're celebrities or something."

"Yeah, I saw it. A few years ago I would have loved the attention, but now…" she brushed the hair on Nathan's head away as he slept in the car seat that sat between them.

"Changes everything doesn't it?" Claire remarked pointedly.

"Yeah, it does" Shannon agreed softly, knowing exactly what she meant.

* * *

"Damn it!" 

Aaron and Grace glanced up from their cereal at Shannon, who furiously crumpled the morning newspaper in a wrinkled ball and threw it to the side. Catching sight of their faces she softened her features and let her head hang limply.

"Sorry"

Grace slid off the chair and shuffled over to her.

"It's okay, Mommy, you'll find something soon." She ran her fingers through Shannon's blonde hair. Shannon turned her mopey eyes up toward her daughter, then scooped her up.

"You know, I'm supposed to be the one to mother you, not the other way around."

"I don't mind," Grace stated proudly in a squeaky voice.

"I'm supposing there were no listings in the paper today either?" Claire remarked knowingly as she emerged from her bedroom. Her kimono-like bathrobe was baggy in the sleeves and when her stretched her arms up in a yawn, they took the look of a gigantic bird of prey spreading its wings.

"Not unless you count 'Receptionist: Pleasant voice and size C cup preferable"

Claire chuckled. "Guess not then."

She filled up a teapot and set it on the stove.

"But don't worry too much. Something is bound to turn up eventually," she wrapped her fingers around Shannon's clenched hand, " and you're welcome to stay here as long as you want until you get settled."

"Thanks, that means a lot" Shannon smiled thankfully.

"Just as long as it's not too terribly long" Charlie piped up, appearing from the bedroom as well. He kissed Claire on the crown of her head. "Morning luv."

"Charlie," she said warningly, narrowing her eyes at him.

He shrunk away and held up his hands in defense.

"I'm just saying that you don't want to stay stuck with us for much longer," he squeezed Claire's shoulder lovingly, "I'm afraid to say that we're not much fun around here."

"Maybe you're not, old man", Claire giggled.

"Hey!" Charlie exclaimed, straightening up and taking on a look of offense, "I told you my age in confidence!"

Claire stifled a laugh. "The point is that there's no rush. It's just a matter of time before you find something."

She stood and plucked up the screaming teapot off the stove.

"I'm not so sure. I haven't worked since that summer job as a ballet instructor. The only work I've done since then was conning and I just can't bring myself to go back into that again. Plus Boone's dead so who would I gyp?"

Shannon's eyes were focused on Nathan in his baby seat so she didn't see the shocked look on both Charlie and Claire's faces. Their mouths gaped in speechlessness before they dismissed it and went back to the conversation.

"Well why don't you just go back to ballet? There's a dance school just up the road," Claire offered. She poured the boiling water into three teacups and began riffling around in the cupboard above the coffee maker.

"I'm not exactly as flexible as I used to be." Shannon's voice was sad and regretful. She slipped another spoonful of orangey-red glop into Nathan's mouth, scooping the larger percent of it that dripped down his chin and tried again to get it actually into his stomach.

Claire noticed, not for the first time, how much Shannon had changed since the crash. At first meeting her, Claire would have never pegged her as being a patient mother. There was times when the old Shannon showed through, but that was usually when she was protecting her children. Or a sales rack.

Claire sighed as her hand finally found the jar with the tea bags and she fished out three of those as well.

"Maybe you just need to get back into the hang of it," Claire sounded hopeful as she dipped each pocket of herbs in the scorching water.

Shannon sighed as well.

"Maybe"

Claire set the cup and saucer in front of Shannon, trying to coax her out of her glum.

"Thanks"

Shannon wiped Nathan's chin of the baby food, taking one sip of the tea on the place mat in front of her before draping a splattered cloth over her shoulder and gently putting him in the crook of her neck. She patted his back softly and glanced back up at Claire.

"I'm just worried, that's all. It's not like I'm the most qualified person for any job." She kissed Nathan's temple and tucked a strand of hair behind Grace's ear. "I'm a single twenty-four year old with two kids. I love my children, but that doesn't exactly bode well for me."

"Hey." Claire said softly, scooting a chair up next to Shannon's. "You'll never be alone. When we crashed on that island we all made forty-seven lifetime friends."

"Forty-six," Shannon corrected, "Ethan wasn't one of us and even if he were, I'm pretty sure he would have been disowned when he kidnapped you guys."

Claire forced a half smile. "The good old days."

Shannon laughed. "Yeah, some good old days."

* * *

Shannon glanced down at the waitress' uniform in her hand, something about the god-awful checkerboard-print burning into her skin. Her thumb ran over the nametag pinned to the front, swiping once over the engraved lettering. So maybe it would be so bad. She'd serve some specials platters, pour some coffee, get her ass smacked a few times… Shannon cringed at the thought. But instead she tightened her jaw and let the hand that gripped the apron fall to her side. She had to do this. She had a family to provide for now. She didn't think money exactly sprouted from trees, even if she'd never really been a huge arboricultural student, so this was the only way she could hold her tiny makeshift family afloat. 

Someone knocked softly on her bedroom door.

"Come in!" she yelled, knowing it was Claire ready to give her a ride on her first day back to work. Yet when the blonde woman entered she looked unsure and kind of shaky.

"Shannon?" Claire asked gingerly, Shan glanced up from her bed, arching her eyebrows in a 'what now?' sort of way. "There's someone here to see you"

Shannon crinkled her nose and walked out the door with her, one step behind. When they rounded the corner, an elderly man sat in Charlie's usual place at the breakfast table, Charlie standing in the corner, a 'harrumph' look on his face. She didn't recognize the visitor.

"Who are you?"

"Well hello Miss. Rutherford, it has been quite difficult tracking you down." He sounded annoyed.

"I don't exactly have a steady home at the moment." Shannon realized after a moment that she shouldn't be the one doing the explaining in this situation, "Is there some reason you need to find me?"

"I suppose I should assume then that you weren't aware that the will was read a week ago."

Shannon gave him a confused look. "Whose will?"

"Mr. Carlisle, you're step-brother. I was his lawyer"

"Oh," she sounded dumbfounded and disappointed all at once, then she looked up suddenly, "Boone had a will?"

"Yes, my dear, he wanted to make sure that everything was in order in case of the unexpected."

Shannon let out a small laugh, "He was always the responsible one." Letting her slight smile fade she looked him directly in the eye. "But what does that have to do with me?"

Now it was the lawyer's turn to be confused.

"Well don't you see? He left everything to you."

Shannon plopped down into the nearest chair, her brain function too busy trying to comprehend that it couldn't be bothered with standing upright. Her mouth formed around the words, but no sound came out. Claire spoke them for her.

"What?"

He gave them all a patronizing look. "Mr. Carlisle stated quite clearly in his last will and testament that the entirely of his estate and funds, valued at approximately $700, 000 dollars, are to be passed on to his step-sister, that would be you, Miss. Shannon Rutherford, upon his death."

Shannon breathed in quickly, feeling an asthma attack coming on. Just as she was about to look to Claire for help, she felt the plastic inhaler slide into her hand. Shannon glanced down to find Grace's tiny fist pushing the device toward her. Shan gave her a thankful smile. She must have gotten the persuasion for saving her from her father.

"Now, if you're not too busy at the moment." Shannon let the waitress uniform fall to her side, "I have some papers for you to sign. Once you've crossed all the 'T's and dotted all the 'i's, you'll be all set."

* * *

"Mommy?" 

Shannon didn't look away from the mirror at her daughter, who now sat on the bathroom sink, intently watching her apply make-up.

"Yeah babe?"

Grace knit her eyebrows, a very familiar gesture in that family, as she tried to find the right words.

"Am I different than Nathan?" Shannon paused mid brush and studied her daughter's reflection in the mirror. She carefully set down the blush applicator and pursed her lips.

"Why would you say something like that?" her voice was shaky, and she knew Grace noticed. The girl had always been very perceptive.

Grace stared downward, abashed, and swung her legs that dangled from over the counter. "Oh I don't know. Just…" she bit her lip, wondering whether to go further, "what Grandma said. About Daddy and how that made us different."

"Forget everything that bi-" she stopped herself, "-woman said. She had no clue what she was talking about."

"But I don't understand. Nathan doesn't look like me. Maybe Grandma was right…"

"Hey" she said sternly, raising Grace's chin with her forefinger. "You guys are NOT different. You are exactly the same. It's just that…" she searched for the right explanation to make her daughter understand. Then she got it. "You're not different, you're both my babies. You, Grace, are just a whiter shade of pale."

* * *

Remember to look for the follow-up story, "Disconnect the Dots" !


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